Author of Humorous Books to help you feel better about yourself.
If You Think That's Bad
And
Seven Habits of Highly Effective Slackers
Available Now
A result of three decades of field research while embedded in over 30 worksites, Pat Downey has observed, studied, posted bail for, and interviewed the most work-shy gainfully employed members of the labor market and uncovered their secrets.
In the first chapter of this book, you’ll discover the Seven Habits of Highly Effective Slackers and the Two Non-Negotiables of Upward Failure.
Alone, these strategies would be worth their weight in sick days. However, close the imaginary door to your cubicle, fire up your non-compliant space heater, and continue your education with the following bonus lessons:
How to Win Friends and Influence People with Chocolate-Covered Cherries
The Cost-Benefit Analysis- The Golden (Girls) Rule
The Too Weak Notice
Clocked Out for Lunch- A Burger King Worldview
Office Bathroom- First Day Do’s and Don’ts
Office Birthday Celebrations: Understanding Your Rights
Breaking the Fourth Wall- Legends of the Cubicle
The Mid-Life Crisis Grab Bag:
- Strike One: Graduate School
- Strike Two: Truck Driving Academy
- Strike Three: Carnival
And more … but that’s enough to keep you busy for now.
No matter where you are on your countdown to retirement, this collection of essays will make you feel better about yourself- no matter the choices you’ve made.
Available Now
From time to time, we all take things a little too far.
We stalk Roscoe P. Coletrain, see symbolism in a discarded liver sausage, or spend too much money to custom-tailor our Humpty Dumpty costume.
Or we make honest mistakes. We forget we’re on a date, purchase stolen electronics, or, while wearing only underpants, lock ourselves out of our hotel room. Or we just flat-out fail, maybe by running up a $42,000 phone bill or having our chest hair mocked on national television.
In the name of public service – or so he tells himself – author Pat Downey has accomplished all of these feats, and more.
Plagued by ruminations over your own idiotic decisions or absurd circumstances?
Read this therapeutic book and start feeling better about yourself today!